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♥ KoyaShigeDake ♥
KSDRR - Story Masterpost 
20th-Apr-2013 12:04 pm
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Welcome to the KoyaShigeDake Round Robin (KSDRR) fanfic. This is the story post where each entry will be posted as the story takes shape.

You can track this post to follow story updates, and it will be added to the Masterpost list under Links in the sidebar of the community as well.

The basic information can be found in the sign up post => here though just a couple of reminders before we get started.

Please start your section with the final sentence of the previous entry to link them together.

Post your section in a comment to this post once it's done but if you know you won't be able to post anything in 7 days you can pass by either leaving a comment or contacting one of the community mods.

Entries will be added to the main body of the story as they are posted.

Special thanks to bellemainec who has offered to beta entries. You don't have to use a beta but if you'd like someone to look your section over before you post it, please take her up on the offer and contact her via PM at her LJ.

So here is our list of writers. Thanks to everyone who volunteered to participate - and let's have some fun!




1.  Kaminikaku - Opening Section

Koyama cracks one eye open, and then shuts it as the morning light seems to sear into his brain like a laser. He waits and then opens the other eye. That's better. As he has his face buried in his pillow, he can't see anything. No laser burning into his brain. Which is an improvement, as his head is already pounding like a herd of elephants is stampeding through it.

Just how much alcohol had he drunk last night?

Surely not enough for this hangover?

He risks opening the other eye, and the laser has dialled itself down to a very bright torch.

Squinting, he checks his alarm clock. 7:45 am. Right, that should be enough time to make himself presentable, if he starts moving now. Moving very very slowly.

The room is warm enough for him to leave his robe behind, and instead he grabs the pair of jeans he wore last night from their place on the floor and pulls them over warm bare skin. He staggers slowly towards his kitchen, thankful that his kitchen window faces west, not east, so the light is dimmer there. The water is cool from the tap, and he lets it run over his hands before he fills a glass, and chugs it down. He drinks another glass, and then rummages in the cutlery drawer for a pack of Tylenol. One of Shige's better ideas – keep the headache medicine near the water source.

He swallows down two, and then one more for good measure. It might be wishful thinking, but he thinks the stampeding elephants are slowly turning into rabbits, or at least something much smaller and less painful. He fills the glass one more time, and heads towards his couch to recover.

The TV remote is within easy reach, but he doesn't think he could cope with the cheerfulness of the morning show right now. He leans back and places the glass against his temples and then his throat, enjoying the coldness of the smooth glass against his collarbone. Something hard and round is digging into his back, and he reaches behind to grab it.

It's a button attached to a pair of jeans.

Koyama blinks and checks again.

A pair of jeans.

A pair of jeans that look exactly like the pair he wore last night.

Wait.

If these are the jeans he wore last night, then ….

He looks down. He is wearing those jeans already. How can he be holding a pair of jeans and wearing them too? How can there be two pairs of jeans that are the same?

Wait.

What if they aren't his?

Or more importantly, whose jeans is he holding right now? Whose are they? Could they belong to...

Koyama claps his hands over his ears as his doorbell rings, and rings and rings, as if someone is deliberately leaning on the button.

2.  Puri

Koyama claps his hands over his ears as his doorbell rings, and rings and rings, as if someone is deliberately leaning on the button.

Next came loud banging on the door that felt as if they were pounding on Koyama's head. With his hands still trying to mute the noise out, he scrambled off of the couch and hurried to the door. One hand immediately undid all the locks and swung the door wide open without even checking to see who it was. Koyama barely had the chance to register the face he saw to the body that came pushing through him.

It was Shige. It was a rather flustered and out-of-breath Shige at that. “Sorry,” he said as he kicked off his shoes at the genkan. “I thought there was someone following me so I walked fast. Then I realized I didn’t grab your keys or my cell phone when I left,” he added, setting the plastic bag he had in his hand down on the coffee table in front of Koyama’s couch. “I got you those eclairs at the conbini you like so much. They’re fresh from this morning.” Shige proceeded to slip off the hoodie he was wearing that Koyama knew wasn’t Shige’s, but his own (along with the rest of his clothes), and sat down on the couch. “You didn’t have a lot of food in your fridge and I was starving when I woke up so this early lunch is on me,” he continued to say, taking out the warmed up bentos from the plastic bag.

All the while, Koyama still stood by the door entrance and feeling his head aching even more as he tried to understand what was going on. “Wait... Shige. I don’t understand.” Slowly, Koyama dragged his feet to Shige and stood in front of him with his eyes darting from the pair of pants that hung on the back of the couch, the pants he was wearing, and the clothes of Shige that belonged to Koyama as well.

Sensing that Koyama was still at a lost, Shige gave the leader a flat-lipped smile. "You got crazy drunk last night, you know." Shige should have known that Koyama wouldn’t remember everything that had gone on last night but he wished did.

“I was?” Shige’s casual and even amused voice helped reassure Koyama a little that last night was a simple episode of getting drunk and having Shige be the responsible adult. Koyama didn’t mind not acting like leader all the time. At least Shige didn’t force restaurant bills upon him.

“Yeah, had to bring you back here again. And then...” Shige looked up at the older man and tried to see if there was anything at all he remembered through the drunken state the other was in. Shige tried to hide how much he didn’t want to be the only one who remembered. “You don’t remember anything?”

Koyama scratched at his head and laughed a little despite the dull aches his head still felt as the painkillers were kicking in. “Not really. I woke up with this headache. Oh, and I ended up wearing the wrong pants. I guess you slept over so these are yours, right?” Koyama tugged at the pants and gave a little wiggle inside of them with a sheepish laugh.

“Um...” Shige’s eyes darted away from Koyama for a moment but quickly met eyes again. “Yeah, that was it.” There was a lot of hope in Shige’s eyes that maybe Koyama could be the best friend that he was and see that Shige was lying.

However, Koyama only laughed again, wincing less than he had before as the headache subsided even more and failed to notice. He finally sat himself down beside Shige now that all seemed well. Somehow, somewhere, in the back of his mind, Koyama had the craziest thought pass through his mind. He didn’t give it another thought and immediately grabbed one of the packaged eclairs instead of the bentos Shige prepared. Koyama ripped through the packaging and happily stuffed the sweet eclair into his mouth for a bite.

While Koyama seemed to be in utter bliss, Shige felt nervous and tense. He lightly tugged at his nose, a nervous habit that Shige still hasn’t broken after all those years. “Um... I think I’m going to take a shower if you don’t mind. I think I still smell like beer and... yeah,” he said with a small laugh and quickly got up to his feet, away from Koyama even before the apartment’s owner answered him. Shige hurried to Koyama’s bathroom, locking the door and pressing his back against it as he tried to collect his thoughts. It was more than alcohol and cigarettes he smelled like mixed with the scent of Koyama’s detergent in the clothes he borrowed when he first woke up in the morning. He didn’t know about Koyama, but Shige could barely feel the the effects of a hangover under what was left of the adrenaline that linger under his skin from the night before.

The water that poured from the shower head finally warmed up and Shige jumped in. As the water washed over him, the feelings from last night came flooding back to him. He didn’t know what to make of what happened and what it would have meant to Koyama but Shige he thought it was something worth remembering. Shige shuddered even under the warm shower, chills spreading over his body as he resisted what the memories were doing to him. All he had was the water to run over him and wash away the scents from his body. Using one of Koyama’s many fragrant body washes and soaps was definitely out of the question. He wouldn’t be able to take carrying his smell with him.

The showerhead was turned off and Shige quickly dried himself off with a towel. He was certainly not putting on Koyama’s clothes again. He knew that he would have to put on his clothes from last night and possibly take another, but proper, shower when he got home. Shige wrapped the towel around his waist and wondered if he would be able to shuffle quickly to find his clothes. He stepped out of the bathroom and was ready to hurry to the bedroom when he heard Koyama’s voice in the living room. Shige could barely hear what Koyama was talking about but he managed to catch a few words that made his heart skip a beat.

3.  enjoythecrisis2 (withdrawn)

4.  kasumi-lavender

Shige could barely hear what Koyama was talking about but he managed to catch a few words that made his heart skip a beat.

He could hear his name being called. He couldn't quite make out the rest but then everyone knows that it's your own name you're most likely to hear even when you aren't listening. However the tone of Koyama's voice made him pause a moment before entering the living room. There was a sense of urgency in his tone. Had something happened? Had he remembered?

As he stepped into the room he noticed immediately that Koyama had now changed into a pair of his own jeans. He stood in the middle of the room, a t-shirt dangling from one hand and a puzzled expression on his face.

Shige could not stop his eyes from moving from Koyama's face downwards towards his naked upper body. He saw it almost immediately and the gasp that escaped his lips had Koyama's free hand moving without hesitation to his own throat blocking Shige's further inspection.

A bruise, a hickey, a love bite - however he might describe it, there it was clear as day. Shige felt another surge of adrenalin, this time preparing his body for escape. Once it had become clear that Koyama didn't have any memory what they had done and said the previous evening, he'd just hoped to make a clean escape. That no longer seemed possible.

"Shige," Koyama's voice was low but strained with emotion, "What happened last night? What did we do?"

Shige still needed a moment to gather his thoughts and reached for his jeans, which he spied over the back of a chair. It didn't help at all as he pulled them on to feel the residual warmth of Koyama's body heat held in the denim seep into his flesh.

Koyama repeated his question, his voice raising in pitch and urgency, "What did we do?"

Shige was trying to avoid answering the direct question as he searched around the couch for the rest of his clothes. But the activity only brought back memories of the night before and his frustration that he was the only one who seemed to remember. He couldn't just tell Koyama as if he was relating the plot of a movie. It was personal and it should be personal for both of them.

"Shige, tell me, please."

He couldn't ignore Koyama's plea, but he had no ready answer for him. He'd thought the subject would come up but the circumstances he'd imagined were vastly different and considerably more pleasurable.

"You really don't remember anything?" Shige tried to keep his voice calm.

"No, I can't," Koyama furrowed his brows in concentration.

"Nothing at all?" Shige moved a step closer, willing Koyama to recall something, anything. It wasn't fair to either of them.

"I can't - it's just a blur, I'm sorry." Koyama sighed.

And for the first time since Shige had entered the room their eyes met. Shige's heart clenched. And then it melted, as it often did when he gazed on Koyama. And now Koyama was looking at him for some reassurance.

Shige stepped in closer, "I, I can't talk about it now. But it's not a bad thing."

Then before his nerve failed him, he reached a hand up behind Koyama's neck and pulled his head forward, sealing their lips in a soft, tender kiss.

Without giving Koyama any chance to respond, he gathered the rest of his clothing and headed for the door, pausing only to comment, "Just think about it, okay, and then we can talk."

----

Koyama wasn't certain how much time had passed after Shige's exit till he was able to move and collapse onto the couch. His mind was racing in a thousand directions but his lips were tingling from where Shige had kissed him and that was completely distracting.

His eyes eventually settled on the floor where he noticed something Shige must have left behind and it was only as he reached for it he realised his hand was trembling.

5.  Sky

His eyes eventually settled on the floor where he noticed something Shige must have left behind and it was only as he reached for it he realized his hand was trembling.

The item he picked up from the floor was Shige's cellphone.

"Oh no... he forgot it again..." Koyama sighed and felt the weight of the cellphone in his still slightly trembling hand. He sat back onto the couch. Should he bring it to Shige right away? But Shige had looked like he didn't want to talk to Koyama as long as he didn't remember what happened last night.

Suddenly Shige's cellphone rang and Koyama – already used to that situation – picked up the call to either confirm Shige's worried voice that he indeed left his cellphone at his friend's place of to tell another caller that Shige was unfortunately not available right now because he forgot his phone.

>>Ohayoooou, Shige-chaaaaan! How was it?!<<, Koyama could hear Tegoshi's happy voice through the speaker.

"Ah, Tegoshi, it's me, Koyama," he answered immediately.

>>Eh? Oh I see, is Shige taking a shower? Or is he still sleeping after such an exhausting night? I bet you guys didn't do it only once, right?.<<, the younger one said in a strange voice before he giggled into the phone.

Koyama frowned and didn't get what Tegoshi was hinting but could it be that the younger one knew anything about last night?

"What are you talking about?" Koyama asked confused.

>>Aaah, come on Kei-chan, don't play dumb! Didn't you two leave together from the bar yesterday to spend the night together doing you know whaaat until the sun rises again?<<

"I know what?"

>>Gosh, Kei-chan, really! I mean Sex! S-E-X! Don't tell me Massu and I made both of you so drunk for nothing!<<, Tegoshi sounded somehow disappointed and Koyama's jaw literally dropped to the floor.

"AAAAAAH!!!!... So we really... Tego, what exactly happened?!" Koyama couldn't believe it.

>>Don't tell me, you forgot about that!... poor Shige... he confessed to you and you hugged him and cried like a baby and a bit later both of you left like two drunken lovebirds.<<

Still Koyama's memory didn't return but it just must have been like Tegoshi said. But... did he and Shige really spend the night together in THAT way? Koyama dropped Shige's phone onto the couch, ignoring Tegoshi's >>Kei-chan, what's up? Why don't you answer<< before the younger one got pissed off and hung up. Koyama brushed his hands through his hair as if this would help him to remember. The hints were clear – the stain on his upper body which just HAD to be a hickey (what else, not even Koyama was so clumsy to hurt himself there), Shige's behavior just a few minutes before, the kiss... no wonder that Shige left when Koyama couldn't remember at all. He must have hurt Shige's feeling deeply with that.

"What kind of friend am I... I'm so stupid..." Koyama cursed, jumped up and began to run in circles for a few minutes, still messing up his own hair. He had to apologize to Shige!

So Koyama grabbed a hat and sunglasses, jumped out the door and picked up the next taxi that crossed his way to ride right to Shige's apartment. He rushed up the stairs of the apartment complex until he reached Shige's door totally exhausted. He pressed the doorbell but nobody answered. He repeated his action but still no response. Koyama started knocking and shouting Shige's name. In the end he slammed his hands so loud against Shige's door that one of the neighbors came out and complained about the nuisance, telling Koyama that the resident of that apartment wasn't home today.

Koyama frowned. Shige wasn't at home? Didn't he return after leaving his place? Where could he be right now?

6.  haruka21

Koyama frowned. Shige wasn't at home? Didn't he return after leaving his place? Where could he be right now?


Koyama was surprised when, without any warning, a large drop of water landed on his face, followed by more thick droplets of rain. It was strange because he was still on the landing outside Shige's door. But the rain keeps falling and he looks around trying to find the source of the water that is bombarding him. He frowns when he sees nothing but the water continues to splash his head and neck.

As he starts to make his way back to the staircase hoping to escape the rain and continue his search for Shige loud music fills the air. He wonders at the hypocrisy of the neighbor that had just chastised him for being a nuisance and now were playing their music so loudly.

Suddenly Koyama's breath is stolen as he receives a face full of water, almost like someone had just dumped a bucket on him. As he tries to recover everything goes black and the music becomes deafening.

"I'm sorry Kei-chan but ttthat the bouncer was going to kick you out if I didn't wake you up," Tegoshi says with a very unapologetic laugh.

"Huh?"

"Keeei-chaaann you caan't sleepp here," Tegoshi says more slowly, sounding a little more sympathetic and a lot more drunk.

For his part Koyama still can't quite wrap his head around what was happening. One minute he was angsting over Shige and the next he was face down on a table in what he guessed was a packed night club.

Koyama knew he was still very drunk but the dream, he guessed it was a dream, was still very fresh in his mind even the parts where he had imagined Shige's feelings and interacted with him. Barely lifting his head he looked past Tegoshi searching for an exit while trying slide out of his chair

"Keeei-chaaan waaiit. Shige went to get a taxi. He's going to take you homme." Koyama felt an overwhelming sense of panic at the idea of Shige taking him home.

"NO can't! Not Shige!"

"Kei-chan of course Shige wants to take you home. After you told him.. You can't say things like that and change your mind. Don't take advantage of Shige's feelings Kei-can."


"What?" He had no chance to ask more because then Shige was at his side.

Koyama could tell that Shige was drunk as well. But his hold was solid as he wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled Koyama to his feet and he had a mysterious twinkle in his eye as he helped Koyama towards the door.


7.  bunny-chan

Koyama could tell that Shige was drunk as well. But his hold was solid as he wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled Koyama to his feet and he had a mysterious twinkle in his eye as he helped Koyama towards the door.

Koyama was suddenly taken by a “déjà vu” feeling. So that’s what he forgot about the night before? Was there even a night before? Was that the real thing? Koyama was too dizzy and confused to think properly about what was really happening and what has happened in his mind. The only thing he was sure now was that he was going home in a taxi with Shige who, by the way, wouldn’t take a silly grin off of his face.
- Ano… Why are you smiling like this? – asked Koyama while the world was spinning around his head.
- Shouldn’t I? – replied Shige – After what you said to me… The least I can do is smile!
“Damn it! What did I say to him?” Koyama couldn’t remember at all! He kept scrubbing his temple as if it was a magic movement that would make everything come back to his mind. Apparently he had said something good. If not, Shige wouldn’t be feeling so comfortable in that taxi, at that time of the night taking a drunk Koyama home. He knew better than anyone how Shige hated to transport his drunk band mates home. He rarely got drunk himself so he didn’t like to take care of annoying guys talking too loud and laughing at his head. Especially Tegoshi…
Shige was calmly starring at the city lights outside the taxi. Little by little, Koyama started feeling comfortable by his side. As usual. Koyama might be the leader but Shige has always been his solid rock. Before he could realize, he was running his fingers through Shige’s hair which made him turn his face to Koyama. He was smiling gently.
- Th…thanks for bringing me home…
- That’s okay. I would never leave you alone like that.
- You are always beside me, Shige. Taking care of me… I wonder if I’m a real leader for…
- Shut up! – said Shige in a firm yet lovable tone – You ARE a great leader! Don’t start that kind of talk again! We had enough of it at the bar!
- I… - Koyama stuttered a little – I don’t quite remember everything that happened in that club…
For some moments, Shige’s sweet smile disappeared. He looked down clearly disappointed. The “déjà vu” feeling came back. “Shit, shit, shit! I hurt his feelings again! Now he’ll kick me out of this taxi! Why I can’t remember what happened tonight?” Koyama was about to apologize to Shige with a crying face as he always did, even if he didn’t have to, when he felt two hands holding his face. He opened his eyes to see Shige’s face really close to his. Koyama’s heart skipped a beat.
- You don’t remember what you said to me, right? – asked Shige with a rather serious face.
- I… I don’t think so… - Koyama’s eyes were watering – I’m… I’m sorry, Shige! That’s why I don’t like to drink too much! I always end up passing out and forgetting everything! I swear I didn’t want to hurt you! I don’t know what I said to you but…
He was suddenly stopped by Shige’s lips.


8.  zephyrskykadet

He was suddenly stopped by Shige’s lips.

Shige had been wanting to do that all night. Or if he was being truly honest, he'd been wanting to do it for years but the right moment never seemed to present itself. Tonight he was buzzed enough from the alcohol in his system and Koyama's earlier words to cross that barrier.

He was rewarded when he felt Koyama's lips begin to move against his own and an arm against his back pulling him closer. He had imagined this moment so many times, yet he'd never pictured it in the back of a taxi. Right now he didn't care as Koyama's willing and talented mouth was sending tingles through his whole body.

The jostling movement of the taxi broke the kiss and Shige could not suppress the grin that spread across his face.

Before he had the chance to process the moment any further, Koyama had gripped his face in both hands and brought their foreheads together.

"Oh, Shige," he breathed, his breath warm against Shige's face, "it's happening again and I'm going to forget in the morning. I don't want to, I want to remember … I don't want to hurt you … I …"

"Shhh, " Shige tried to calm him, "It's okay. We're almost there. Let's wait till we get inside."

Koyama took a long moment to respond and when he finally did it was a whisper. "You know how important you are to me don't you? How I'd never …"

"I know, " he smiled as the taxi pulled up in front of Koyama's building.


As they collapsed onto Koyama's sofa, Shige was increasingly puzzled by Koyama's concerns about not remembering. Maybe there was more too it. It was clear that he didn't remember their earlier conversation, even if his kiss said otherwise.

Shige doesn't want to forget either, so fishes in his pocket for his phone and he's ready when Koyama leans in to pick up where they left off in the cab.

"Don't let me forget …" Koyama murmurs as he ghosts his lips over Shige's before sealing their mouths together.

It's not easy at this angle but Shige manages to snap a few photos of the moment, hoping that at least one of them will capture it clearly.

As the need for oxygen forces them apart, Koyama starts apologising for everything he forgot, and asking Shige to forgive him for tomorrow morning when he won't remember how wonderful this moment was.

Shige can feel that he'd sobered up on the ride back and rational thought was again demanding his attention. Koyama's babbling about forgetting had made him realise that even one night together would be nothing but a cruel trick of fate if he was the only one who remembered it in the light of day.

It takes considerable will power, and some cursing, but Shige helps Koyama out of his jeans and into bed. Koyama smiles and relaxes, his eyes falling closed almost immediately. As Shige is debating the wisdom of brushing the hair from his eyes Koyama stirs to speak softly. "I love you Shige."

Shige knows he has to leave before he regrets it. He returns to the sofa and scrolls through the photos he took only minutes before. Any other time they would be classed as arty. Tonight though, he finds the one that most clearly shows them kissing, types a message and sends the photo with it.

He knows one of the first things Koyama will do when he wakes up is check his phone. Resisting the urge to return to the bedroom, he slips on his shoes and out into the night.


9.  carmine_pink

He knows one of the first things Koyama will do when he wakes up is check his phone. Resisting the urge to return to the bedroom, he slips on his shoes and out into the night.

***

Koyama starts to open his eyes, a tremendous effort since the sunlight seems to want to pierce into them. He is lying in his room, and the bedside clock tells him it’s 7:45 in the morning. Something inside his head is hammering relentlessly, but beneath it a small insistent voice is trying to tell him something.

Something happened last night.

Try as he might Koyama can’t remember what it is, what with the major hangover, so he does the next best thing.

He picks up his jeans from the bedroom floor and puts them on, stumbling slightly as he puts one foot in after another. Then he walks out to the kitchen, grabs a glass and fills it with water before letting the cool liquid wash over his parched throat. One glass isn’t enough; he downs another. The pounding in his head is stubborn, so he searches for some painkillers and takes them, too.

His headache is slowly easing as he throws himself down on the couch, and consequently the small voice beneath it gets more insistent.

Something important happened last night.

Koyama takes a deep breath and tries to calm himself. Last night… he must’ve gotten massively drunk… and then he…

The pictures come to him gradually, like flipping through a photo album. He remembers waking up before, just like this, but with Shige there in his apartment. He didn’t recall what happened at the club the previous night, but it seemed Shige did. Judging from what Tegoshi told Koyama on the phone, the haphazardly discarded clothes, and the love bite on his neck, it didn’t take a genius to figure out what took place the night before…

Then a few more things happened and suddenly Koyama was at the club again, not remembering anything, again. Shige took him home afterward and things got a bit blurry from there. And now he’s back to the start, to the morning after.

Is this some kind of joke from the universe? Is this like that movie Groundhog Day which he watched together with Shige once, where a single day repeats itself over and over? Is there a hidden lesson he’s supposed to learn here?

He shifts a bit on the couch and only then realizes something bulging from his jeans pocket. His cell phone. Instinctively he fishes it out and flips it open, one of the things he always does in the morning.

There’s a new picture message from Shige, sent last night.

Koyama opens it and his heart does a little flip, maybe two.

It’s a picture of him and Shige. The angle is awkward, like one of them took it using a phone, but there is no mistaking what it shows. Koyama has a hand on Shige’s cheek, holding him in place, their lips fusing together.

This happened last night.

As Koyama stares at the picture, he thinks he can taste them once again, Shige’s lips on his, slightly chapped, unbelievably sweet. His face grows hot.

Not until he finally tears his eyes away from the picture does he notice the brief message that came with it.

“Don’t forget.”

The heat spreads all the way to his chest, blossoming there. A word floats from his mouth, little more than a sigh, “Shige.”

As if in response, his doorbell starts to ring.


10. kaminikaku

Don’t forget.”

The heat spreads all the way to his chest, blossoming there. A word floats from his mouth, little more than a sigh, “Shige.”

As if in response, his doorbell starts to ring.



Koyama jumps off the couch in fright. The doorbell had startled him so much, almost as if just saying Shige's name has made him appear! Koyama breathes deeply, trying to slow his heart rate down as he hurries to the door.

If he can make Shige appear now, just by saying his name, that will be very very useful.

He pulls open the door with a huge grin, and the name “Shige!” rings happily in the air.

Massu blinks.

Koyama blinks.

They look blankly at each other until Koyama finally says, “Massu.”

Massu nods, and confirms it. “Not Shige.”

Koyama remembers his manners and ushers him inside, Massu slips off his shoes and heads towards the couch.

Koyama starts to ask if he wants tea, and then remembers that his phone is sitting on the table in front of the couch and is open on a picture of him kissing Shige which Massu will see, so Koyama throws himself over the back of the couch to stop it happening.

“Koyama?” Massu says uncertainly, standing beside the couch as Koyama attempts to nonchalantly pick up his phone, and hide it in his jeans while making it look like he is just sitting down. “What are you doing?”

“Nothing!” Koyama explains, and waves his hands, happily noting that they are both empty as his phone is safely hidden now. “Just making sure the couch is comfortable for you. Would you like tea?” He jumps to his feet. “I'll make us some tea. Sit down, sit down.” He waves at the couch, and hurries into the kitchen.

He pours water into the kettle, and puts it on the stove to boil. His head is still pounding, so he takes the chance to drink another glass of water, and holds the cold glass against his temples for a moment. Everything is moving so quickly, and he is still trying to sort through what actually happened, what might have happened and what didn't happen. He hopes the painkillers really start working soon.

He pulls the phone out of his pocket, and checks the picture. Don't forget. Don't forget. It's the same awkward angle as before, but this time his fingertips tingle as he can almost feel the slight roughness of stubble along the curve of Shige's cheek -

“What's that?” Massu asks.

The phone drops to the floor and Koyama stares in horror as Massu bends to pick it up.

“Nothing,” he stammers. “Just a - “

Massu whistles. “That's not nothing.” He turns the phone, checking the picture from each angle. “That's definitely something, Koyama.”

“Give it back,” Koyama stretches out his hand. “Please.”

With a grave look, Massu hands over the phone. “Of course.”

“It's not what you think,” Koyama starts to explain, but Massu cuts him off.

“What exactly is it that I am thinking?”
“That I ki– that we ki- that he ki- that there was a kiss.”

“It certainly looks like there was one.” Massu squints at the phone, trying to check the picture out to confirm, but Koyama automatically hides it behind his back with a blush. “Maybe we should take another look at it?”

“No.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“That there was a kiss, or that we should take another look at it?” Massu asks, a little grin curving his lips.

“That there was a -” Koyama stops, and then slumps against the counter. “I don't know. I just – I don't know.”

Massu steps closer, and holds out his hand. Koyama passes the phone to him reluctantly. “It definitely looks like a kiss to me.”

Koyama nods.

“So we agree that it is a kiss?”

Koyama nods again.

Massu scrolls, and sees the short message. “Don't forget?”

Koyama nods for a third time, and a little bit of understanding glows in Massu's eyes.

“You can't remember?” Massu asks gently.

Koyama shakes his head. “No.” He takes a deep breath. “No, I can't. I woke up with a hangover and I can't remember anything.”

“Can you remember anything at all? What's the last thing you remember?” Massu prods. “Walk back through the night, take it slowly.”

“That's part of the problem! I can't tell what's real and what's not. I think we all went out drinking last night. I think I got very drunk. I think I might have slept with Shige. I think Tegoshi may have poured water on me. I think you and Tegoshi might have deliberately got me drunk. I think I kissed Shige. I think Shige was happy that I did. I think Shige bought me eclairs for breakfast...” Koyama took a deep breath, and stared at the phone in Massu's hands. “I think I really hurt Shige by not remembering what happened.”

“That's a lot of not remembering anything,” Massu says solemnly, and hands the phone back to Koyama.
“I can fill in a few things for you though.”

Koyama looks at him with hope in his eyes.

“We had dinner last night, the four of us, you, me, Tegoshi and Shige. After a long day in the studio, we wanted to blow off some steam. So we had yakiniku and lots of alcohol.”

Koyama nods, as a vague memory stirs. “Did Tegoshi make some joke about the cow tongue plate? About how man could live on tongue alone but it wouldn't fully explain things to him in the morning?”

Massu shakes his head. “No, that was Shige, trying to be funny.”

“It was Shige?” Koyama closes his eyes and tries to remember. “I am sure it was Tegoshi.”

“No, Koyama. It was Shige.” Massu waits for him to open his eyes. “He said it after you licked his neck.”

“After I what?”

“Licked his neck.” Massu points at his collarbone, then draws his finger up, all the way up, along the curve of his jaw to his earlobe. “You wanted tequila and thought Shige was a good salt lick.”

“I what?”

“You don't remember the tequila?”

“No.”

“It was after the beer.”

“Oh.”

“And the cocktails.”

“Oh.”

Koyama looks at his phone. “You mean I licked Shige before I - “ he waves the phone at Massu and then forces the words out, “before I kissed Shige?”

“It seems that way,” Massu says.

“What else did I do?” Koyama asks quietly, not meeting Massu's eyes. “Did I lick Tegoshi or you?”

Massu chuckles. “No, you didn't lick either of us. You threatened to burn Tegoshi's soccer boots because the old ones smell bad, and you wanted to know if my triangle earring was a secret message, but that's about all.” He pats Koyama's shoulder. “No dancing on tables, or urinating on taxis, or hitting on waitresses. I promise, nothing too bad happened.”

“Just … Just … I kissed Shige.”

Massu's eyes narrow. “Is that a bad thing?”

Koyama doesn't answer, he doesn't move at all.

“I see.” Massu sighs. “I am a little bit disappointed, Kei-chan. I thought you were a little more open to things like this.” Massu reaches forward and cups Koyama's face, his fingers cool against his jaw. “Do you remember that I kissed you?”

“What?” Koyama jerks away, pushing past Massu and giving himself space. “Why would you want to kiss me?”

“You are an attractive man.” Massu shrugs. “You already said you don't remember kissing Shige, do you remember me kissing you?”

Koyama shakes his head. “This makes no sense. Why would you have kissed me? You don't want to kiss me? I don't want to kiss you. I want to kiss Shige. That makes sense. So why would I kiss you?”

“Back up.” Massu's little smile turns into a grin. “What did you just say?”

“So why would I kiss you?”

“No, before that.”

Koyama pales. “That it makes sense that I want to kiss Shige.”

Massu nods.

“I want to kiss Shige.”

Massu nods.

“That makes sense. I want to kiss Shige.”

Massu nods again.

“I don't remember it though.”

Massu sighs. “At least you remembered that you want to kiss him,” he grumbles.

“Of course I want to kiss Shige. It's Shige!” Koyama protests.

“So you keep saying,” Massu says with a shrug.

Koyama narrows his eyes and fixes Massu with a steely glare. “Did you really kiss me?”

Massu snorts. “Of course not.” He grins at Koyama's relieved sigh. “Why would I want to kiss you? That makes no sense!”

Koyama glares at him, wishing that he had the ability to show just how annoyed he really was, but then he realised he had no idea why Massy was even there. He raises an eyebrow. “I don't even know why you are here.”

“You really do forget the important things don't you?” Massu teases. “You mailed Nakamaru and Kamenashi last night, and asked them to go shopping with us in Omotesando. We are meant to be meeting them in half an hour.”

Koyama automatically checks the time on his phone. “I can't be ready in half an hour! I don't remember mailing them. I just can't do this today.”

With the air of one showing great patience, Massu pulls his own phone out of his pocket. With a few taps, he pulls up a message and shows it to Koyama. “Here you are.”

Koyama shakes his head as he reads through the messages. “What the hell actually happened last night? These messages are perfect. I can't have been drunk enough to forget everything and still send perfect messages like this!”

Massu taps him on the head. “That's because I was the one typing the messages. You weren't capable of anything but raising another glass!” Over Koyama's outraged protests that it couldn't possibly be true, he continues, “You said it had been too long since we had been out like that, so I organised it. They'll be sad you can't make it today.” He turns and walks towards the front door, with Koyama trailing after him. “I'll explain that you weren't feeling up to it this morning, after such a late night.” Massu steps into his shoes, and Koyama stares at him.

“Are you leaving?” he asks.

“Yes. I think we have covered everything I came here for.” Massu stares at him. “Unless you really do want me to kiss you?”

“No!” Koyama recoils and Massu smirks at him, just a little.

“As I said, it makes no sense for me to kiss you.” Massu pauses and Koyama sees the seriousness in his eyes. “I think there is someone else you should be talking to now.”

Koyama doesn't pretend to misunderstand. “I know.”

Massu searches Koyama's face, looking for a hint. “It is a good thing, right?”

Holding his gaze, Koyama takes a deep breath and feels his stomach turn over. “Yes. It's a good thing.”

“In that case,” Massu says as he opens the door. “The next time I see you I expect you will have news for us.” He grins and waves. “News for News!”

Koyama smiles at the joke, and Massu closes the door. He heads back to the couch, the phone still clutched in his hand. He turns it over and over, spinning it through his fingers in a loop.

He really really wants to see Shige, to talk, to explain, to see if maybe they could …

He could just text him, a short message like 'Please come back' and he is sure that Shige would come if he asked. Just like he would go if Shige was the one asking him ...

The phone drops onto the couch with a soft thud.

He knows where Shige is, where Shige would go at a time like this. He knows where to find him.


11. Wrenne

He knows where Shige is, where Shige would go at a time like this. He knows where to find him.

But is he really ready. Ready to look Shige in the face and, in the light of day, with no alcohol to smooth the way, make this all real?

The pounding in his head is back and he decides a shower is the first thing he needs, to clear his head, freshen up and make himself appear more of a catch. He figures his current bleary eyed state and the morning after telltale door of a night spent in a smokey bar weren't exactly presenting him at his best.

Still, even as the soothing water hits his skin he is still thinking about that photo. Thinking about how close he is to Shige and yet that photo and the hazy memories he has at the back of his head promise that they could be even closer. If feels so natural and yet, if it was, why haven't they taken the next step. Or have they?

He wonders when he's disappointed Shige like this before. Has this happened before? He has a feeling that it has and he realises that he is so lucky that Shige hasn't given up on him. Lucky that he sent that photo so Koyama could make amends.

However, instead of beating himself up over a past he can't remember, he closes his eyes and thinks about Shige. They've grown from boys to men together and he's never seen his future life without Shige as a part of it. And now, possibly a bigger part of it than he'd ever allowed himself to imagine, well, except on those occasions when he was alone and …

He can feel it now. The warm body behind him in the shower, pressing close, murmuring his name, then a mouth nuzzling at his neck. He tilts his head to allow the mouth better access, as confident hands move across his upper body massaging and lathering his bare flesh. He relaxes back against the body behind him, allowing himself to be supported as he feels the heat begin to pool in his groin.

And suddenly he is thrown out of the moment. Breathing heavily he leans against the wall for support. Was that simply a fantasy, or was it a fantasy based on a reality just out of his reach?

Only one person could tell him or show him how real it could be. He needed to find Shige. And now he moved with purpose, drying himself off and carefully selecting an outfit that he knew Shige liked.

He paces nervously as he waits for the elevator to arrive at his floor. Then watches the floor numbers count down to the lobby. So intent had he been on the countdown he only looks ahead as the doors ding open. The sight that greets him has him frozen to the spot. He swallows hard.

Shige is standing at the open doors looking tired and definitely like he hasn't been home to bed. He steps around Koyama and into the elevator.

"I think we should go somewhere private." He says quietly before pressing the button for Koyama's floor and sealing them in the elevator alone.

12. haruka21 - Final Section


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ksm04
Comments 
21st-Apr-2013 09:22 am (UTC)
Tada! I was kind of inspired by the icon, and was so happy that I managed to get this finished today! Here we go, and good luck to everyone writing.

Round Robin - entry one.


Koyama cracks one eye open, and then shuts it as the morning light seems to sear into his brain like a laser. He waits and then opens the other eye. That's better. As he has his face buried in his pillow, he can't see anything. No laser burning into his brain. Which is an improvement, as his head is already pounding like a herd of elephants is stampeding through it.

Just how much alcohol had he drunk last night?

Surely not enough for this hangover?

He risks opening the other eye, and the laser has dialled itself down to a very bright torch.

Squinting, he checks his alarm clock. 7:45 am. Right, that should be enough time to make himself presentable, if he starts moving now. Moving very very slowly.

The room is warm enough for him to leave his robe behind, and instead he grabs the pair of jeans he wore last night from their place on the floor and pulls them over warm bare skin. He staggers slowly towards his kitchen, thankful that his kitchen window faces west, not east, so the light is dimmer there. The water is cool from the tap, and he lets it run over his hands before he fills a glass, and chugs it down. He drinks another glass, and then rummages in the cutlery drawer for a pack of Tylenol. One of Shige's better ideas – keep the headache medicine near the water source.

He swallows down two, and then one more for good measure. It might be wishful thinking, but he thinks the stampeding elephants are slowly turning into rabbits, or at least something much smaller and less painful. He fills the glass one more time, and heads towards his couch to recover.

The TV remote is within easy reach, but he doesn't think he could cope with the cheerfulness of the morning show right now. He leans back and places the glass against his temples and then his throat, enjoying the coldness of the smooth glass against his collarbone. Something hard and round is digging into his back, and he reaches behind to grab it.

It's a button attached to a pair of jeans.

Koyama blinks and checks again.

A pair of jeans.

A pair of jeans that look exactly like the pair he wore last night.

Wait.

If these are the jeans he wore last night, then ….

He looks down. He is wearing those jeans already. How can he be holding a pair of jeans and wearing them too? How can there be two pairs of jeans that are the same?

Wait.

What if they aren't his?

Or more importantly, whose jeans is he holding right now? Whose are they? Could they belong to...

Koyama claps his hands over his ears as his doorbell rings, and rings and rings, as if someone is deliberately leaning on the button.
28th-Apr-2013 02:14 pm (UTC)
This was such a great start! I loved the part about the pants but most of all I can't wait till it's my turn!!!
28th-Apr-2013 03:20 am (UTC)
[Part 1]

Koyama claps his hands over his ears as his doorbell rings, and rings and rings, as if someone is deliberately leaning on the button.

Next came loud banging on the door that felt as if they were pounding on Koyama's head. With his hands still trying to mute the noise out, he scrambled off of the couch and hurried to the door. One hand immediately undid all the locks and swung the door wide open without even checking to see who it was. Koyama barely had the chance to register the face he saw to the body that came pushing through him.

It was Shige. It was a rather flustered and out-of-breath Shige at that. “Sorry,” he said as he kicked off his shoes at the genkan. “I thought there was someone following me so I walked fast. Then I realized I didn’t grab your keys or my cell phone when I left,” he added, setting the plastic bag he had in his hand down on the coffee table in front of Koyama’s couch. “I got you those eclairs at the conbini you like so much. They’re fresh from this morning.” Shige proceeded to slip off the hoodie he was wearing that Koyama knew wasn’t Shige’s, but his own (along with the rest of his clothes), and sat down on the couch. “You didn’t have a lot of food in your fridge and I was starving when I woke up so this early lunch is on me,” he continued to say, taking out the warmed up bentos from the plastic bag.

All the while, Koyama still stood by the door entrance and feeling his head aching even more as he tried to understand what was going on. “Wait... Shige. I don’t understand.” Slowly, Koyama dragged his feet to Shige and stood in front of him with his eyes darting from the pair of pants that hung on the back of the couch, the pants he was wearing, and the clothes of Shige that belonged to Koyama as well.

Sensing that Koyama was still at a lost, Shige gave the leader a flat-lipped smile. "You got crazy drunk last night, you know." Shige should have known that Koyama wouldn’t remember everything that had gone on last night but he wished did.

“I was?” Shige’s casual and even amused voice helped reassure Koyama a little that last night was a simple episode of getting drunk and having Shige be the responsible adult. Koyama didn’t mind not acting like leader all the time. At least Shige didn’t force restaurant bills upon him.

“Yeah, had to bring you back here again. And then...” Shige looked up at the older man and tried to see if there was anything at all he remembered through the drunken state the other was in. Shige tried to hide how much he didn’t want to be the only one who remembered. “You don’t remember anything?”

Koyama scratched at his head and laughed a little despite the dull aches his head still felt as the painkillers were kicking in. “Not really. I woke up with this headache. Oh, and I ended up wearing the wrong pants. I guess you slept over so these are yours, right?” Koyama tugged at the pants and gave a little wiggle inside of them with a sheepish laugh.

“Um...” Shige’s eyes darted away from Koyama for a moment but quickly met eyes again. “Yeah, that was it.” There was a lot of hope in Shige’s eyes that maybe Koyama could be the best friend that he was and see that Shige was lying.

However, Koyama only laughed again, wincing less than he had before as the headache subsided even more and failed to notice. He finally sat himself down beside Shige now that all seemed well. Somehow, somewhere, in the back of his mind, Koyama had the craziest thought pass through his mind. He didn’t give it another thought and immediately grabbed one of the packaged eclairs instead of the bentos Shige prepared. Koyama ripped through the packaging and happily stuffed the sweet eclair into his mouth for a bite.

Edited at 2013-04-28 03:22 am (UTC)
28th-Apr-2013 03:22 am (UTC)
[Part 2]

While Koyama seemed to be in utter bliss, Shige felt nervous and tense. He lightly tugged at his nose, a nervous habit that Shige still hasn’t broken after all those years. “Um... I think I’m going to take a shower if you don’t mind. I think I still smell like beer and... yeah,” he said with a small laugh and quickly got up to his feet, away from Koyama even before the apartment’s owner answered him. Shige hurried to Koyama’s bathroom, locking the door and pressing his back against it as he tried to collect his thoughts. It was more than alcohol and cigarettes he smelled like mixed with the scent of Koyama’s detergent in the clothes he borrowed when he first woke up in the morning. He didn’t know about Koyama, but Shige could barely feel the the effects of a hangover under what was left of the adrenaline that linger under his skin from the night before.

The water that poured from the shower head finally warmed up and Shige jumped in. As the water washed over him, the feelings from last night came flooding back to him. He didn’t know what to make of what happened and what it would have meant to Koyama but Shige he thought it was something worth remembering. Shige shuddered even under the warm shower, chills spreading over his body as he resisted what the memories were doing to him. All he had was the water to run over him and wash away the scents from his body. Using one of Koyama’s many fragrant body washes and soaps was definitely out of the question. He wouldn’t be able to take carrying his smell with him.

The showerhead was turned off and Shige quickly dried himself off with a towel. He was certainly not putting on Koyama’s clothes again. He knew that he would have to put on his clothes from last night and possibly take another, but proper, shower when he got home. Shige wrapped the towel around his waist and wondered if he would be able to shuffle quickly to find his clothes. He stepped out of the bathroom and was ready to hurry to the bedroom when he heard Koyama’s voice in the living room. Shige could barely hear what Koyama was talking about but he managed to catch a few words that made his heart skip a beat.
28th-Apr-2013 02:24 pm (UTC)
I really liked where you took the story and the ending really left me wanting more! I can't wait to see how the next writer continues it.
1st-May-2013 12:58 pm (UTC)
great addition! I loved the entry of Shige (and the eclairs!) and his point of view, loved the hint that Koyama has missed and the shower was both heatbreaking and sweet. Can't wait for the next entry :)
14th-May-2013 10:36 am (UTC)

Shige could barely hear what Koyama was talking about but he managed to catch a few words that made his heart skip a beat.

He could hear his name being called. He couldn't quite make out the rest but then everyone knows that it's your own name you're most likely to hear even when you aren't listening. However the tone of Koyama's voice made him pause a moment before entering the living room. There was a sense of urgency in his tone. Had something happened? Had he remembered?

As he stepped into the room he noticed immediately that Koyama had now changed into a pair of his own jeans. He stood in the middle of the room, a t-shirt dangling from one hand and a puzzled expression on his face.

Shige could not stop his eyes from moving from Koyama's face downwards towards his naked upper body. He saw it almost immediately and the gasp that escaped his lips had Koyama's free hand moving without hesitation to his own throat blocking Shige's further inspection.

A bruise, a hickey, a love bite - however he might describe it, there it was clear as day. Shige felt another surge of adrenalin, this time preparing his body for escape. Once it had become clear that Koyama didn't have any memory what they had done and said the previous evening, he'd just hoped to make a clean escape. That no longer seemed possible.

"Shige," Koyama's voice was low but strained with emotion, "What happened last night? What did we do?"

Shige still needed a moment to gather his thoughts and reached for his jeans, which he spied over the back of a chair. It didn't help at all as he pulled them on to feel the residual warmth of Koyama's body heat held in the denim seep into his flesh.

Koyama repeated his question, his voice raising in pitch and urgency, "What did we do?"

Shige was trying to avoid answering the direct question as he searched around the couch for the rest of his clothes. But the activity only brought back memories of the night before and his frustration that he was the only one who seemed to remember. He couldn't just tell Koyama as if he was relating the plot of a movie. It was personal and it should be personal for both of them.

"Shige, tell me, please."

He couldn't ignore Koyama's plea, but he had no ready answer for him. He'd thought the subject would come up but the circumstances he'd imagined were vastly different and considerably more pleasurable.

"You really don't remember anything?" Shige tried to keep his voice calm.

"No, I can't," Koyama furrowed his brows in concentration.

"Nothing at all?" Shige moved a step closer, willing Koyama to recall something, anything. It wasn't fair to either of them.

"I can't - it's just a blur, I'm sorry." Koyama sighed.

And for the first time since Shige had entered the room their eyes met. Shige's heart clenched. And then it melted, as it often did when he gazed on Koyama. And now Koyama was looking at him for some reassurance.

Shige stepped in closer, "I, I can't talk about it now. But it's not a bad thing."

Then before his nerve failed him, he reached a hand up behind Koyama's neck and pulled his head forward, sealing their lips in a soft, tender kiss.

Without giving Koyama any chance to respond, he gathered the rest of his clothing and headed for the door, pausing only to comment, "Just think about it, okay, and then we can talk."

----

Koyama wasn't certain how much time had passed after Shige's exit till he was able to move and collapse onto the couch. His mind was racing in a thousand directions but his lips were tingling from where Shige had kissed him and that was completely distracting.

His eyes eventually settled on the floor where he noticed something Shige must have left behind and it was only as he reached for it he realised his hand was trembling.
14th-May-2013 11:13 am (UTC)
Another great addition! I loved the love bite! I can't wait to see where the next person takes it! It's almost my turn. I'm so excited!
20th-May-2013 02:56 pm (UTC)
Here comes my part =) Since it's the first time I participate in something like that... I hope it turned out OK! I'm really curious about the continuation! ^^ Here we go! =)


His eyes eventually settled on the floor where he noticed something Shige must have left behind and it was only as he reached for it he realized his hand was trembling.

The item he picked up from the floor was Shige's cellphone.

„Oh no... he forgot it again...“, Koyama sighed and felt the weight of the cellphone in his still slightly trembling hand. He sat back onto the couch. Should he bring it to Shige right away? But Shige had looked like he didn't want to talk to Koyama as long as he didn't remember what happened last night.

Suddenly Shige's cellphone rang and Koyama – already used to that situation – picked up the call to either confirm Shige's worried voice that he indeed left his cellphone at his friend's place of to tell another caller that Shige was unfortunately not available right now because he forgot his phone.

>>Ohayoooou, Shige-chaaaaan! How was it?!<<, Koyama could hear Tegoshi's happy voice through the speaker.

„Ah, Tegoshi, it's me, Koyama“, he answered immediately.

>>Eh? Oh I see, is Shige taking a shower? Or is he still sleeping after such an exhausting night? I bet you guys didn't do it only once, right?.<<, the younger one said in a strange voice before he giggled into the phone.

Koyama frowned and didn't get what Tegoshi was hinting but could it be that the younger one knew anything about last night?

„What are you talking about?“, Koyama asked confused.

>>Aaah, come on Kei-chan, don't play dumb! Didn't you two leave together from the bar yesterday to spend the night together doing you know whaaat until the sun rises again?<<

„I know what?“

>>Gosh, Kei-chan, really! I mean Sex! S-E-X! Don't tell me Massu and I made both of you so drunk for nothing!<<, Tegoshi sounded somehow disappointed and Koyama's jaw literally dropped to the floor.

„AAAAAAH!!!!... So we really... Tego, what exactly happened?!“, Koyama couldn't believe it.

>>Don't tell me, you forgot about that!... poor Shige... he confessed to you and you hugged him and cried like a baby and a bit later both of you left like two drunken lovebirds.<<

Still Koyama's memory didn't return but it just must have been like Tegoshi said. But... did he and Shige really spend the night together in THAT way? Koyama dropped Shige's phone onto the couch, ignoring Tegoshi's >>Kei-chan, what's up? Why don't you answer<< before the younger one got pissed off and hung up. Koyama brushed his hands through his hair as if this would help him to remember. The hints were clear – the stain on his upper body which just HAD to be a hickey (what else, not even Koyama was so clumsy to hurt himself there), Shige's behavior just a few minutes before, the kiss... no wonder that Shige left when Koyama couldn't remember at all. He must have hurt Shige's feeling deeply with that.

„What kind of friend am I... I'm so stupid...“, Koyama cursed, jumped up and began to run in circles for a few minutes, still messing up his own hair. He had to apologize to Shige!

So Koyama grabbed a hat and sunglasses, jumped out the door and picked up the next taxi that crossed his way to ride right to Shige's apartment. He rushed up the stairs of the apartment complex until he reached Shige's door totally exhausted. He pressed the doorbell but nobody answered. He repeated his action but still no response. Koyama started knocking and shouting Shige's name. In the end he slammed his hands so loud against Shige's door that one of the neighbors came out and complained about the nuisance, telling Koyama that the resident of that apartment wasn't home today.

Koyama frowned. Shige wasn't at home? Didn't he return after leaving his place? Where could he be right now?
28th-May-2013 05:18 pm (UTC)
Koyama frowned. Shige wasn't at home? Didn't he return after leaving his place? Where could he be right now?


Koyama was surprised when, without any warning, a large drop of water landed on his face, followed by more thick droplets of rain. It was strange because he was still on the landing outside Shige's door. But the rain keeps falling and he looks around trying to find the source of the water that is bombarding him. He frowns when he sees nothing but the water continues to splash his head and neck.

As he starts to make his way back to the staircase hoping to escape the rain and continue his search for Shige loud music fills the air. He wonders at the hypocrisy of the neighbor that had just chastised him for being a nuisance and now were playing their music so loudly.

Suddenly Koyama's breath is stolen as he receives a face full of water, almost like someone had just dumped a bucket on him. As he tries to recover everything goes black and the music becomes deafening.

"I'm sorry Kei-chan but ttthat the bouncer was going to kick you out if I didn't wake you up," Tegoshi says with a very unapologetic laugh.

"Huh?"

"Keeei-chaaann you caan't sleepp here," Tegoshi says more slowly, sounding a little more sympathetic and a lot more drunk.

For his part Koyama still can't quite wrap his head around what was happening. One minute he was angsting over Shige and the next he was face down on a table in what he guessed was a packed night club.

Koyama knew he was still very drunk but the dream, he guessed it was a dream, was still very fresh in his mind even the parts where he had imagined Shige's feelings and interacted with him. Barely lifting his head he looked past Tegoshi searching for an exit while trying slide out of his chair

"Keeei-chaaan waaiit. Shige went to get a taxi. He's going to take you homme." Koyama felt an overwhelming sense of panic at the idea of Shige taking him home.

"NO can't! Not Shige!"

"Kei-chan of course Shige wants to take you home. After you told him.. You can't say things like that and change your mind. Don't take advantage of Shige's feelings Kei-can."


"What?" He had no chance to ask more because then Shige was at his side.

Koyama could tell that Shige was drunk as well. But his hold was solid as he wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled Koyama to his feet and he had a mysterious twinkle in his eye as he helped Koyama towards the door.
2nd-Jun-2013 06:29 pm (UTC)
LJ is trolling me and it's the 3rd time i'm trying to post it! hope it wrks now!! >.<

"Koyama could tell that Shige was drunk as well. But his hold was solid as he wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled Koyama to his feet and he had a mysterious twinkle in his eye as he helped Koyama towards the door."

Koyama was suddenly taken by a “déjà vu” feeling. So that’s what he forgot about the night before? Was there even a night before? Was that the real thing? Koyama was too dizzy and confused to think properly about what was really happening and what has happened in his mind. The only thing he was sure now was that he was going home in a taxi with Shige who, by the way, wouldn’t take a silly grin off of his face.
- Ano… Why are you smiling like this? – asked Koyama while the world was spinning around his head.
- Shouldn’t I? – replied Shige – After what you said to me… The least I can do is smile!
“Damn it! What did I say to him?” Koyama couldn’t remember at all! He kept scrubbing his temple as if it was a magic movement that would make everything come back to his mind. Apparently he had said something good. If not, Shige wouldn’t be feeling so comfortable in that taxi, at that time of the night taking a drunk Koyama home. He knew better than anyone how Shige hated to transport his drunk band mates home. He rarely got drunk himself so he didn’t like to take care of annoying guys talking too loud and laughing at his head. Especially Tegoshi…
Shige was calmly starring at the city lights outside the taxi. Little by little, Koyama started feeling comfortable by his side. As usual. Koyama might be the leader but Shige has always been his solid rock. Before he could realize, he was running his fingers through Shige’s hair which made him turn his face to Koyama. He was smiling gently.
- Th…thanks for bringing me home…
- That’s okay. I would never leave you alone like that.
- You are always beside me, Shige. Taking care of me… I wonder if I’m a real leader for…
- Shut up! – said Shige in a firm yet lovable tone – You ARE a great leader! Don’t start that kind of talk again! We had enough of it at the bar!
- I… - Koyama stuttered a little – I don’t quite remember everything that happened in that club…
For some moments, Shige’s sweet smile disappeared. He looked down clearly disappointed. The “déjà vu” feeling came back. “Shit, shit, shit! I hurt his feelings again! Now he’ll kick me out of this taxi! Why I can’t remember what happened tonight?” Koyama was about to apologize to Shige with a crying face as he always did, even if he didn’t have to, when he felt two hands holding his face. He opened his eyes to see Shige’s face really close to his. Koyama’s heart skipped a beat.
- You don’t remember what you said to me, right? – asked Shige with a rather serious face.
- I… I don’t think so… - Koyama’s eyes were watering – I’m… I’m sorry, Shige! That’s why I don’t like to drink too much! I always end up passing out and forgetting everything! I swear I didn’t want to hurt you! I don’t know what I said to you but…
He was suddenly stopped by Shige’s lips.

8th-Jun-2013 10:27 am (UTC)
He was suddenly stopped by Shige’s lips.


Shige had been wanting to do that all night. Or if he was being truly honest, he'd been wanting to do it for years but the right moment never seemed to present itself. Tonight he was buzzed enough from the alcohol in his system and Koyama's earlier words to cross that barrier.

He was rewarded when he felt Koyama's lips begin to move against his own and an arm against his back pulling him closer. He had imagined this moment so many times, yet he'd never pictured it in the back of a taxi. Right now he didn't care as Koyama's willing and talented mouth was sending tingles through his whole body.

The jostling movement of the taxi broke the kiss and Shige could not suppress the grin that spread across his face.

Before he had the chance to process the moment any further, Koyama had gripped his face in both hands and brought their foreheads together.

"Oh, Shige," he breathed, his breath warm against Shige's face, "it's happening again and I'm going to forget in the morning. I don't want to, I want to remember … I don't want to hurt you … I …"

"Shhh, " Shige tried to calm him, "It's okay. We're almost there. Let's wait till we get inside."

Koyama took a long moment to respond and when he finally did it was a whisper. "You know how important you are to me don't you? How I'd never …"

"I know, " he smiled as the taxi pulled up in front of Koyama's building.


As they collapsed onto Koyama's sofa, Shige was increasingly puzzled by Koyama's concerns about not remembering. Maybe there was more too it. It was clear that he didn't remember their earlier conversation, even if his kiss said otherwise.

Shige doesn't want to forget either, so fishes in his pocket for his phone and he's ready when Koyama leans in to pick up where they left off in the cab.

"Don't let me forget …" Koyama murmurs as he ghosts his lips over Shige's before sealing their mouths together.

It's not easy at this angle but Shige manages to snap a few photos of the moment, hoping that at least one of them will capture it clearly.

As the need for oxygen forces them apart, Koyama starts apologising for everything he forgot, and asking Shige to forgive him for tomorrow morning when he won't remember how wonderful this moment was.

Shige can feel that he'd sobered up on the ride back and rational thought was again demanding his attention. Koyama's babbling about forgetting had made him realise that even one night together would be nothing but a cruel trick of fate if he was the only one who remembered it in the light of day.

It takes considerable will power, and some cursing, but Shige helps Koyama out of his jeans and into bed. Koyama smiles and relaxes, his eyes falling closed almost immediately. As Shige is debating the wisdom of brushing the hair from his eyes Koyama stirs to speak softly. "I love you Shige."

Shige knows he has to leave before he regrets it. He returns to the sofa and scrolls through the photos he took only minutes before. Any other time they would be classed as arty. Tonight though, he finds the one that most clearly shows them kissing, types a message and sends the photo with it.

He knows one of the first things Koyama will do when he wakes up is check his phone. Resisting the urge to return to the bedroom, he slips on his shoes and out into the night.
15th-Jun-2013 02:57 am (UTC)
He knows one of the first things Koyama will do when he wakes up is check his phone. Resisting the urge to return to the bedroom, he slips on his shoes and out into the night.

***

Koyama starts to open his eyes, a tremendous effort since the sunlight seems to want to pierce into them. He is lying in his room, and the bedside clock tells him it’s 7:45 in the morning. Something inside his head is hammering relentlessly, but beneath it a small insistent voice is trying to tell him something.

Something happened last night.

Try as he might Koyama can’t remember what it is, what with the major hangover, so he does the next best thing.

He picks up his jeans from the bedroom floor and puts them on, stumbling slightly as he puts one foot in after another. Then he walks out to the kitchen, grabs a glass and fills it with water before letting the cool liquid wash over his parched throat. One glass isn’t enough; he downs another. The pounding in his head is stubborn, so he searches for some painkillers and takes them, too.

His headache is slowly easing as he throws himself down on the couch, and consequently the small voice beneath it gets more insistent.

Something important happened last night.

Koyama takes a deep breath and tries to calm himself. Last night… he must’ve gotten massively drunk… and then he…

The pictures come to him gradually, like flipping through a photo album. He remembers waking up before, just like this, but with Shige there in his apartment. He didn’t recall what happened at the club the previous night, but it seemed Shige did. Judging from what Tegoshi told Koyama on the phone, the haphazardly discarded clothes, and the love bite on his neck, it didn’t take a genius to figure out what took place the night before…

Then a few more things happened and suddenly Koyama was at the club again, not remembering anything, again. Shige took him home afterward and things got a bit blurry from there. And now he’s back to the start, to the morning after.

Is this some kind of joke from the universe? Is this like that movie Groundhog Day which he watched together with Shige once, where a single day repeats itself over and over? Is there a hidden lesson he’s supposed to learn here?

He shifts a bit on the couch and only then realizes something bulging from his jeans pocket. His cell phone. Instinctively he fishes it out and flips it open, one of the things he always does in the morning.

There’s a new picture message from Shige, sent last night.

Koyama opens it and his heart does a little flip, maybe two.

It’s a picture of him and Shige. The angle is awkward, like one of them took it using a phone, but there is no mistaking what it shows. Koyama has a hand on Shige’s cheek, holding him in place, their lips fusing together.

This happened last night.

As Koyama stares at the picture, he thinks he can taste them once again, Shige’s lips on his, slightly chapped, unbelievably sweet. His face grows hot.

Not until he finally tears his eyes away from the picture does he notice the brief message that came with it.

“Don’t forget.”

The heat spreads all the way to his chest, blossoming there. A word floats from his mouth, little more than a sigh, “Shige.”

As if in response, his doorbell starts to ring.
24th-Jun-2013 05:17 pm (UTC)
Sorry for the delay in getting this posted, I hope you enjoy the next installment....it was a little unexpected in terms of people appearing!

“Don’t forget.”

The heat spreads all the way to his chest, blossoming there. A word floats from his mouth, little more than a sigh, “Shige.” 

As if in response, his doorbell starts to ring.



Koyama jumps off the couch in fright. The doorbell had startled him so much, almost as if just saying Shige's name has made him appear! Koyama breathes deeply, trying to slow his heart rate down as he hurries to the door.

If he can make Shige appear now, just by saying his name, that will be very very useful.

He pulls open the door with a huge grin, and the name “Shige!” rings happily in the air.

Massu blinks.

Koyama blinks.

They look blankly at each other until Koyama finally says, “Massu.”

Massu nods, and confirms it. “Not Shige.”

Koyama remembers his manners and ushers him inside, Massu slips off his shoes and heads towards the couch.

Koyama starts to ask if he wants tea, and then remembers that his phone is sitting on the table in front of the couch and is open on a picture of him kissing Shige which Massu will see, so Koyama throws himself over the back of the couch to stop it happening.

“Koyama?” Massu says uncertainly, standing beside the couch as Koyama attempts to nonchalantly pick up his phone, and hide it in his jeans while making it look like he is just sitting down. “What are you doing?”

“Nothing!” Koyama explains, and waves his hands, happily noting that they are both empty as his phone is safely hidden now. “Just making sure the couch is comfortable for you. Would you like tea?” He jumps to his feet. “I'll make us some tea. Sit down, sit down.” He waves at the couch, and hurries into the kitchen.

He pours water into the kettle, and puts it on the stove to boil. His head is still pounding, so he takes the chance to drink another glass of water, and holds the cold glass against his temples for a moment. Everything is moving so quickly, and he is still trying to sort through what actually happened, what might have happened and what didn't happen. He hopes the painkillers really start working soon.

He pulls the phone out of his pocket, and checks the picture. Don't forget. Don't forget. It's the same awkward angle as before, but this time his fingertips tingle as he can almost feel the slight roughness of stubble along the curve of Shige's cheek -

“What's that?” Massu asks.

The phone drops to the floor and Koyama stares in horror as Massu bends to pick it up.

“Nothing,” he stammers. “Just a - “

Massu whistles. “That's not nothing.” He turns the phone, checking the picture from each angle. “That's definitely something, Koyama.”

“Give it back,” Koyama stretches out his hand. “Please.”

With a grave look, Massu hands over the phone. “Of course.”

“It's not what you think,” Koyama starts to explain, but Massu cuts him off.

“What exactly is it that I am thinking?”
“That I ki– that we ki- that he ki- that there was a kiss.”

“It certainly looks like there was one.” Massu squints at the phone, trying to check the picture out to confirm, but Koyama automatically hides it behind his back with a blush. “Maybe we should take another look at it?”

“No.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

“That there was a kiss, or that we should take another look at it?” Massu asks, a little grin curving his lips.

“That there was a -” Koyama stops, and then slumps against the counter. “I don't know. I just – I don't know.”

Massu steps closer, and holds out his hand. Koyama passes the phone to him reluctantly. “It definitely looks like a kiss to me.”

Koyama nods.

“So we agree that it is a kiss?”

Koyama nods again.

Massu scrolls, and sees the short message. “Don't forget?”

Koyama nods for a third time, and a little bit of understanding glows in Massu's eyes.

24th-Jun-2013 05:18 pm (UTC)
“You can't remember?” Massu asks gently.

Koyama shakes his head. “No.” He takes a deep breath. “No, I can't. I woke up with a hangover and I can't remember anything.”

“Can you remember anything at all? What's the last thing you remember?” Massu prods. “Walk back through the night, take it slowly.”

“That's part of the problem! I can't tell what's real and what's not. I think we all went out drinking last night. I think I got very drunk. I think I might have slept with Shige. I think Tegoshi may have poured water on me. I think you and Tegoshi might have deliberately got me drunk. I think I kissed Shige. I think Shige was happy that I did. I think Shige bought me eclairs for breakfast...” Koyama took a deep breath, and stared at the phone in Massu's hands. “I think I really hurt Shige by not remembering what happened.”

“That's a lot of not remembering anything,” Massu says solemnly, and hands the phone back to Koyama.
“I can fill in a few things for you though.”

Koyama looks at him with hope in his eyes.

“We had dinner last night, the four of us, you, me, Tegoshi and Shige. After a long day in the studio, we wanted to blow off some steam. So we had yakiniku and lots of alcohol.”

Koyama nods, as a vague memory stirs. “Did Tegoshi make some joke about the cow tongue plate? About how man could live on tongue alone but it wouldn't fully explain things to him in the morning?”

Massu shakes his head. “No, that was Shige, trying to be funny.”

“It was Shige?” Koyama closes his eyes and tries to remember. “I am sure it was Tegoshi.”

“No, Koyama. It was Shige.” Massu waits for him to open his eyes. “He said it after you licked his neck.”

“After I what?”

“Licked his neck.” Massu points at his collarbone, then draws his finger up, all the way up, along the curve of his jaw to his earlobe. “You wanted tequila and thought Shige was a good salt lick.”

“I what?”

“You don't remember the tequila?”

“No.”

“It was after the beer.”

“Oh.”

“And the cocktails.”

“Oh.”

Koyama looks at his phone. “You mean I licked Shige before I - “ he waves the phone at Massu and then forces the words out, “before I kissed Shige?”

“It seems that way,” Massu says.

“What else did I do?” Koyama asks quietly, not meeting Massu's eyes. “Did I lick Tegoshi or you?”

Massu chuckles. “No, you didn't lick either of us. You threatened to burn Tegoshi's soccer boots because the old ones smell bad, and you wanted to know if my triangle earring was a secret message, but that's about all.” He pats Koyama's shoulder. “No dancing on tables, or urinating on taxis, or hitting on waitresses. I promise, nothing too bad happened.”

“Just … Just … I kissed Shige.”

Massu's eyes narrow. “Is that a bad thing?”

Koyama doesn't answer, he doesn't move at all.

“I see.” Massu sighs. “I am a little bit disappointed, Kei-chan. I thought you were a little more open to things like this.” Massu reaches forward and cups Koyama's face, his fingers cool against his jaw. “Do you remember that I kissed you?”

“What?” Koyama jerks away, pushing past Massu and giving himself space. “Why would you want to kiss me?”

24th-Jun-2013 05:19 pm (UTC)
“You are an attractive man.” Massu shrugs. “You already said you don't remember kissing Shige, do you remember me kissing you?”

Koyama shakes his head. “This makes no sense. Why would you have kissed me? You don't want to kiss me? I don't want to kiss you. I want to kiss Shige. That makes sense. So why would I kiss you?”

“Back up.” Massu's little smile turns into a grin. “What did you just say?”

“So why would I kiss you?”

“No, before that.”

Koyama pales. “That it makes sense that I want to kiss Shige.”

Massu nods.

“I want to kiss Shige.”

Massu nods.

“That makes sense. I want to kiss Shige.”

Massu nods again.

“I don't remember it though.”

Massu sighs. “At least you remembered that you want to kiss him,” he grumbles.

“Of course I want to kiss Shige. It's Shige!” Koyama protests.

“So you keep saying,” Massu says with a shrug.

Koyama narrows his eyes and fixes Massu with a steely glare. “Did you really kiss me?”

Massu snorts. “Of course not.” He grins at Koyama's relieved sigh. “Why would I want to kiss you? That makes no sense!”

Koyama glares at him, wishing that he had the ability to show just how annoyed he really was, but then he realised he had no idea why Massy was even there. He raises an eyebrow. “I don't even know why you are here.”

“You really do forget the important things don't you?” Massu teases. “You mailed Nakamaru and Kamenashi last night, and asked them to go shopping with us in Omotesando. We are meant to be meeting them in half an hour.”

Koyama automatically checks the time on his phone. “I can't be ready in half an hour! I don't remember mailing them. I just can't do this today.”

With the air of one showing great patience, Massu pulls his own phone out of his pocket. With a few taps, he pulls up a message and shows it to Koyama. “Here you are.”

Koyama shakes his head as he reads through the messages. “What the hell actually happened last night? These messages are perfect. I can't have been drunk enough to forget everything and still send perfect messages like this!”

Massu taps him on the head. “That's because I was the one typing the messages. You weren't capable of anything but raising another glass!” Over Koyama's outraged protests that it couldn't possibly be true, he continues, “You said it had been too long since we had been out like that, so I organised it. They'll be sad you can't make it today.” He turns and walks towards the front door, with Koyama trailing after him. “I'll explain that you weren't feeling up to it this morning, after such a late night.” Massu steps into his shoes, and Koyama stares at him.

“Are you leaving?” he asks.

“Yes. I think we have covered everything I came here for.” Massu stares at him. “Unless you really do want me to kiss you?”

“No!” Koyama recoils and Massu smirks at him, just a little.

“As I said, it makes no sense for me to kiss you.” Massu pauses and Koyama sees the seriousness in his eyes. “I think there is someone else you should be talking to now.”

Koyama doesn't pretend to misunderstand. “I know.”

Massu searches Koyama's face, looking for a hint. “It is a good thing, right?”

Holding his gaze, Koyama takes a deep breath and feels his stomach turn over. “Yes. It's a good thing.”

“In that case,” Massu says as he opens the door. “The next time I see you I expect you will have news for us.” He grins and waves. “News for News!”

Koyama smiles at the joke, and Massu closes the door. He heads back to the couch, the phone still clutched in his hand. He turns it over and over, spinning it through his fingers in a loop.

He really really wants to see Shige, to talk, to explain, to see if maybe they could …

He could just text him, a short message like 'Please come back' and he is sure that Shige would come if he asked. Just like he would go if Shige was the one asking him ...

The phone drops onto the couch with a soft thud.

He knows where Shige is, where Shige would go at a time like this. He knows where to find him.
25th-Jun-2013 02:59 am (UTC)
Such a great addition. LOL, Massu was so precious. I'm really excited to see where this is heading!
1st-Jul-2013 01:41 pm (UTC)
He knows where Shige is, where Shige would go at a time like this. He knows where to find him.


But is he really ready. Ready to look Shige in the face and, in the light of day, with no alcohol to smooth the way, make this all real?

The pounding in his head is back and he decides a shower is the first thing he needs, to clear his head, freshen up and make himself appear more of a catch. He figures his current bleary eyed state and the morning after telltale door of a night spent in a smokey bar weren't exactly presenting him at his best.

Still, even as the soothing water hits his skin he is still thinking about that photo. Thinking about how close he is to Shige and yet that photo and the hazy memories he has at the back of his head promise that they could be even closer. If feels so natural and yet, if it was, why haven't they taken the next step. Or have they?

He wonders when he's disappointed Shige like this before. Has this happened before? He has a feeling that it has and he realises that he is so lucky that Shige hasn't given up on him. Lucky that he sent that photo so Koyama could make amends.

However, instead of beating himself up over a past he can't remember, he closes his eyes and thinks about Shige. They've grown from boys to men together and he's never seen his future life without Shige as a part of it. And now, possibly a bigger part of it than he'd ever allowed himself to imagine, well, except on those occasions when he was alone and …

He can feel it now. The warm body behind him him the shower, pressing close, murmuring his name, then a mouth nuzzling at his neck. He tilts his head to allow the mouth better access, as confident hands move across his upper body massaging and lathering his bare flesh. He relaxes back against the body behind him, allowing himself to be supported as he feels the heat begin to pool in his groin.

And suddenly he is thrown out of the moment. Breathing heavily he leans against the wall for support. Was that simply a fantasy, or was it a fantasy based on a reality just out of his reach?

Only one person could tell him or show him how real it could be. He needed to find Shige. And now he moved with purpose, drying himself off and carefully selecting an outfit that he knew Shige liked.

He paces nervously as he waits for the elevator to arrive at his floor. Then watches the floor numbers count down to the lobby. So intent had he been on the countdown he only looks ahead as the doors ding open. The sight that greets him has him frozen to the spot. He swallows hard.

Shige is standing at the open doors looking tired and definitely like he hasn't been home to bed. He steps around Koyama and into the elevator.

"I think we should go somewhere private." He says quietly before pressing the button for Koyama's floor and sealing them in the elevator alone.


Edited at 2013-07-01 01:43 pm (UTC)
22nd-Jul-2013 04:38 pm (UTC) - The long overdue ending!
Sorry this took so long.

Shige is standing at the open doors looking tired and definitely like he hasn't been home to bed. He steps around Koyama and into the elevator.

"I think we should go somewhere private." He says quietly before pressing the button for Koyama's floor and sealing them in the elevator alone.


Silence permeates the elevator but Koyama feels like he can't break it.

There is an awkwardness surrounding them. Koyama wants to make it right but he feels like his lack of memories from the night (hell, nights) before puts him at a disadvantage. He peeks at Shige from the corner of his eye. He looks so serious. Koyama hadn't known what he expected but not this.

Afraid to make eye contact Koyama lets his eyes roam down from his face to fall on a small red mark on Shige neck right above his collar bone. He wonders if it's his own handy work.

Looking at the mark and thinking of what it must have been like to taste Shige's skin Koyama feels a spark shoot down his body. Knowing that these thoughts are inappropriate considering the current atmosphere Koyama turns his head back towards the elevator doors just as they open to his floor.

The silence continues to haunt them all the way inside Koyama's apartment and to the couch. They sit slightly turned towards each other as if deep in discussion but with neither of them speaking or making eye contact.

Koyama wants to run. All his rational thought seems to have disappeared. He has never felt this nervous in his life. Being around Shige was usually easy. Of course Koyama's physical attraction towards him sometimes made things strained but Koyama usually was able to compartmentalize those feelings so that they didn't effect their time together. Always thinking that the physical and mental were disconnected, but with the mystery of what he'd said as well as the photographic evidence of their kiss, Koyama now knew all of that had been wrong. He had been suppressing the truth.

"Koyama," Shige said, startling Koyama a little and pulling him out of his own thoughts, "I'm sorry."

Koyama looked directly at Shige who still wasn't looking at him and was instead focusing on his hands. There was an embarrassed quality about Shige's demeanor and his voice had a hint of shame to it. For the life of him though, Koyama couldn't understand what Shige could be apologizing for.

"I have been walking around since I left trying to put my thoughts in order," he continued. "For what it's worth I regretted it before I was out of the building but …"

Koyama has to stop him. His mind still doesn't seem to be able to wrap around what Shige is trying to say but his heart is telling him that it's not what he wants to hear.

"What are you talking about? Why are you apologizing?"

Shige finally meets his eyes to give him a surprised but perplexed look.

"What do you mean what do I mean? Didn't you look at your phone?"

Koyama feels his face heat up but nods in the affirmative.

"You saw the picture right?"

All Koyama can do is nod again.

Shige looks a little flustered. He looks at his hands again for a moment before continuing. "Then you should know why I'm apologizing," he says in a quieter voice. "I know you don't remember it but it's happened before. The first time was after we were told that we would be allowed to restart NEWS as 6. We got so drunk that night. At one point we ended up going to karaoke to wait out the trains. You put in a NEWS song and then started crying while you were singing which made me cry too. You started to comfort me and then we were kissing and then … you just passed out. I spent the rest of the time trying to revive you enough to get you into a cab. The next day you acted like nothing had happened."

Koyama shifted uncomfortably. He remembered getting drunk and vaguely remembered uncomfortably waking up at Shige's family's house the next day but nothing more. The kiss and the karaoke were black holes in his memories.

"So I didn't say anything either. I figured it was because you were drunk and emotionally overwrought. And when it happened again I was sure it was just because you were drunk. But last night felt different and after what you said I thought…"
22nd-Jul-2013 04:43 pm (UTC) - part 2

"But what exactly did I say?"

"See this is why I never should have sent you the picture!"

"Shige can't you just tell me? I know I should remember but I don't and I've got to know."

Shige's eyes go back to his hands like he's afraid to look Koyama in the eyes and silence descends again.

But Koyama waits. He knows Shige well enough to know that if he rushes him now Shige won't ever tell him and he's got to know. It's not like he doesn't have a good idea as to what he probably said but it feels like having Shige say it will make all of it real.

"I'm sorry Koyama, I, can't say … that." There are tears in his eyes as he says it and Koyama can feel Shige shutting down.

"Shige," he says cupping Shige's face and using his thumb to swipe at a tear, "Do you know what I felt when I open your mail this morning?"

Koyama knows he's making the right decision even as he knows he is changing everything between them forever but it's Shige so it can't be helped

"No," Shige says in a teary voice, "What?"

"At first I was shocked. Then, I thought it looked hot." Koyama can hear Shige take a shocked little breath and feel the heat starting to creep up his own face. "But the whole time nothing felt very different…" Shige tries to pull away but stops as Koyama quickly finishes his sentence, "Because I couldn't possibly love you more than I already do."

It seems to be the most natural thing that he should be kissing Shige. He can't help it now, sliding his tongue into the wet heat of Shige's mouth and pulling him closer, his own words making him realize just how badly he wants this.

When they break apart to breath Koyama finds himself retracing his tracks from the previous night, finding that desirable spot of neck and savoring it's forgotten taste, the salty sweet flavor of Shige.

"You asked me if I loved you." Shige said with a small moan moving his head to give Koyama better access.

"What?" Koyama asked pulling back to look Shige in the eyes. Koyama felt like he had let lust get the better of him but all of his being wanted to know the answer to this question.

"I said you asked me if I loved you." Shige answered in a quieter voice.

"And what did you say?"

Shige hesitated but finally whispered, "I said yes … but then you forgot you asked me." Another tear rolled down Shige's cheek at this admission and Koyama just wants pull him close and try to make up for he had done wrong. First though, he can tell Shige has more to say, so he waits and let's him continue.

"At first I didn't let it bother me. I was so drunk and you kept kissing me and it seemed like it didn't matter but you kept asking me to not let you forget. So I took the picture but afterwards I wondered if I had imagined something more than there really was, if it wasn't just a repeat from before."

Koyama pulls Shige closer and speaks into his hair, "It's taken us a long time to get here. We were so young when we first met and this kind of love didn't even occur to me then but it's always been there in the background and I'm glad we've finally made it here and I promise if you'll let me I'll love you enough to make up for all the times I didn't realize it and all the times I forgot."

Shige pulls back and gently kisses him. It's sweet and tender and he can taste Shige's tears and Koyama is completely addicted. The moment seems to spin out of control and before he can even think about his actions too much, he's pushing Shige back against the couch and deepening their kiss.

Just kissing Shige is already making him hard. He hadn't realized how much he wanted him until this moment. Shige's moans only fuel his desires as his mouth and his hand each seek out their own targets.

Koyama's tongue laps at Shige's neck as his hand makes contact with the front of his jeans.

"Don't stop! It feels so good!" Koyama has no intention of stopping. He can't help but grind himself into Shige's thigh as he works his hand inside Shige's jeans to find Shige just as turned on as he is.

22nd-Jul-2013 04:45 pm (UTC) - part 3


Watching Shige fall apart beneath him, stroking him hot and hard as he moans his name is making Koyama burn for more. He doesn't think he can last much longer with all these new and exciting feelings enveloping him but he needs more now.

As he starts to fumble at his own fly Shige's hand meets his. Shige is hesitant, like he's not sure what to do but it takes Koyama's breath away when he reaches inside his underwear and takes him in his hand. Shige's soft hands slide down his length and everything else comes to a stand still as he slowly strokes him. Koyama wants to just enjoy the moment while he can. But this is all so new and exciting and he knows he's being selfish.

Using more self control than he realized he had he pulls his pants and underwear down the sufficient few inches to move them out of the way. Shige watches Koyama as he slides Shige's own pants down over his thighs then he carefully lowers himself down onto the hot throbbing heat of Shige's cock pressing it firmly against his own. They moan in unison the feeling is almost painful and yet overwhelming.

Just as strong though is the lust darkened heat in Shige's eyes, in their even deeper depths is a promise of forever. Koyama reaches between them kissing Shige with a promise of his own. The heat, the emotion, the sensations are too much and they don't last long. Shige's hand lacing with his own increases the tempo. He thinks he hears an 'I love you' before Shige lets go. But there's little he can do but feel as Shige's cum coats their joined hands and cocks and he gives into his own release.


A buzzing fills the apartment and Shige is quick to push the snooze button. He knows he has to get up but the pounding in his head is making it difficult. He forces himself up anyway grabbing a pair of jeans off the floor. He slips them on and pads his way into the kitchen.

Grabbing a glass he fills it with water and pulls some aspirin out of a kitchen drawer. He downs them with another glass of water. He makes his way back in to the living room and sits down on the sofa. He jumps when a noise comes from the front door.

"Why are you wearing my pants?" Koyama asks, carrying his convenience store bags over to join him.

"I'm not sure, I guess I thought they were mine. Anyway can you keep it down. I've got a headache and I've got to take a shower before I leave."

Koyama gives him a pitying look before pulling an array of éclairs and bentos out of his bags. "Here at least have something to eat before you go," he says holding up an éclair  

"Ugh you know I hate those things."

"But you love me, right?" Koyama asks as he leans in and kiss him.

Shige makes a noise of protest when Koyama leans him back further into the couch.

"Something poking me." Koyama wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. "Not that. From behind." When Koyama's smile gets bigger Shige gives him a playful slap and reaches behind him to pull out a pair of jeans.

"Have you ever felt like you have lived the same moment before?"

"You mean like déjà vu?" Shige asks as he stands up and throws the jeans towards Koyama's head.

"Déjà what?"

"Nevermind let's take a shower," he says walking to Koyama's bathroom.

Koyama let's the pants drop from his hands as he runs to join him.
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